I know it's been a while....

Hey ladies! I know it's been a while since I've given you an update, but not much has happened. I've still been working on losing weight. I've lost 22.6 lbs now!!! Excited it not even close to how I feel. DH and I have already books our beach trip for our 4 year anniversary in June. I'm ready to sport that bathing suit and short. But of course if for "SOME REASON" I have a belly bump (LOL) I would still sport that with pride!!! LOL! We go back to the doctor the middle of February, that is unless AF shows up on her own around the 7th. Then we will go sooner. Which is fine with me! I'm ready to get things starting again!!!

On another note, I got a (new to me) vehicle. YAY!!! I LOVE IT! It's a 2006 Honda Pilot. We have plenty of room to grow into now.

LOVE IT!!! I have been wanting one of these for a long time!!!!
Third row seats!!! Lots of room!!! Now all we need is a baby to fill up that space!!!

Just The Girls

This past weekend was my mom's 48th Birthday. I called my Aunts (My mom's sisters) and asked if they wanted to go out with us Friday night. We decided we would all go to Sips and Stokes. If you haven't heard of this before, it a class that teaches you how to paint a certain painting while you sip on wine or any other drink. We had such a great time and i could tell my mom really enjoyed it.

Me and My Mom getting ready to paint. The best Mom ever!!!

My Aunts Theresa and Margaret. Love these Gals!!!

The Finished Product! Theresa, Me, My Mom, and Margaret.

Eating TCBY after painting. Poor Margaret had to sit in the naughty chair. LOL!!!



This is a video of my Aunts practicing their ZUMBA while our paintings dried at Sips and Stokes. P.S. They didn't know that I was videoing them! Lol!

Updates: AF, TTC, WEIGHT.......

This is a little update about EVERYTHING.

Update #1 -AF
. Well af showed up last friday. After being gone for nearly 2 months she decided to show up. I guess I have to be positive and be glad that at least she did show up on her own. I'm just hoping that those pesky cysts are gone now


Update #2 -TTC
DH and I decided that we are not going to start trying to have a baby again this month. We decided to put it off for another month and start trying again in February. We are waiting mainly because we still need a break. You don't have much of a break during the holidays because of visiting with family and having to go here and there and everywhere. So we decided we needed a longer break. Can't believe I'm actually saying that, but I really need it.


Update #3 -WEIGHT
I have been on my diet for 6 weeks today and had my 6 week weigh in this afternoon. I have lost 17.2 LBS total now!!!!!!! WOW....I'm so proud of myself. I'm almost half way to my goal. Only 20 more to go. Lol.

Questions Still UNANSWERED.....

Well a year ago today (Jan 5, 2010) we lost our sweet baby. I went in at 6:00 am to the surgical center and was put to sleep for my d&c. I don't want to go back into details or get myself upset again by re-living that day so I am just going to link you to the blog I wrote about it and the days that followed. D&C DAY and DAYS LATER. Those next few days had me questioning God. Not only about what had happened, but even about who he is. How he could let that happen. I know it's wrong to question God in any way, but in times like those i think God forgives us for not trusting in him. He understands that we are at our lowest and we have to learn that the only way up is to have faith. The sad thing is that even today I wish I knew the answer to at least ONE of the questions that I begged God to tell me. "WHY?" That's all I wanted and STILL want to know today. I can only hope that one day God will show me why he let such a thing happen to us. Why he made us go through all that pain? Why he tested our faith so much? Why would he take away the thing that meant the most to us? And why infertility and miscarriage is now a part of our lives? Ok, so there is a lot of "Why" questions that I would love to know. I have a feeling that 20 years from now I will still be asking these same questions, but in the end I have learned that it all boils down to FAITH. Faith in God and his plans for us.

I know i haven't been blogging much and what little I have been blogging has been about past events and emotions and I'm sorry I've been a "Debbie Downer" here lately. It's been a hard past few weeks and even though it has been a whole year ago that all this has happened, it still feels like it happened yesterday. I'm ready to get back to the TTC journey but unfortunately it looks like Mid February is when we will start trying again. That kind of makes me sad but maybe the wait will pay off. I don't have much to blog about and that's why I haven't been blogging a lot. I promise I will try and do better though. LOL.

Apparently, Regular is NOT a word that my body understands...

Well as you know, we have been ttc the good old fashion way since the end of November. Well af was due on Dec. 18 but she never showed. DH and I couldn't stand it anymore so I took a pregnancy test on Christmas Eve. And NO we didn't get the Christmas present that we REALLY wanted. It was negative. Af still hadn't showed up, which did not surprise me at all. But this week I have been spotting a little. Not sure what is going on. Who knows with my crazy body. I will spot one day and nothing the next. This has been going on for 5 days now. So, I've come to the conclusion that my body doesn't know what the definition to REGULAR is. I had to laugh at DH though. I told him the other day that i thought af was coming and he said "It shows up just out of nowhere?". Lol.....yep hun. That is the story of my life. Never know when or where so you have to always be prepared! Haha!!!!

One year ago today......

***originally blogged on 12/14/2010***

Well, one year ago today was one of the happiest days of our lives. On December 14, 2009 we found out that we were pregnant with our sweet little "angel" baby. Although our miracle baby didn't get to stay here on earth with us long, there wasn't anybody that could have loved that baby more than my husband and I. If you want to read my blog about when we got "THE NEWS" then just click HERE. To finish reading how I told DH just click HERE. Those next few weeks was filled with doctor visits and emotional highs and lows. It was the hardest thing that has ever happened to us but we wouldn't have made it to today without the unconditional love of our Heavenly Father.

Although things didn't go the way we wanted and our little baby is now taking care of us from heaven, he or she still impacted us in a way I can't even begin to explain. It's hard to believe that it has been a whole year since that day. Still today i don't know what God's plan is for us or even if children are in HIS plan, but I know that HE knows what is best for us and i trust him completely. We will get to meet you one day "little one"! Until then, the heavenly father is holding you close in his arms away from ALL harm.

Another great week....

This weeks weigh in I lost 4.2 lbs!!!!! Yay a total of 9.2 lbs in 2 weeks! Excited is an understatement! Now only 30 more to go. Haha! At this rate I should reach my goal by the end of January and we can start ttc again in February!!!! Yay! This is not something my doctor told us we had to do, it is just something that I think may help out a little. So I might end up giving in and start ttc again mid-January! Who knows!


On another note, Christmas is right around the corner! And as far as Christmas shopping, I am WAY behind. I have only bought 2 gifts and I have a lot more to buy. I guess i need to get busy. I'm not the type that likes to give money or gift cards so I guess I make it a little hard on myself by having to come up with gifts. But, in the end it is fun to see how well you know some people.

Not much going on......

Nothing is happening here. We are still on our break from ttc and I am actually enjoying it a little bit. It's good to not have to worry about shots, cycle days, blood work, ultrasounds, follicles, iui's or even 2 week waits. Wow, there really is a lot of time put into infertility and ttc.
On a good note, I weighed in at Bariatric yesterday and in 1 week I have lost 5 POUNDS!!!! YAY!!!!! I'm so excited! This just makes us a little closer to getting back on the ttc train again!!!!

Loving my new camera....

Here are a few pics from our trip to Tannehill. We had so much fun and enjoyed our time alone together!
I just LOVE when the leaves begin to change!!! Beautiful!


Love it!

Black and white pics are one of my favs.

Felt like we were in the mountains!

Busy Week and Bad News....

Sorry it has taken me so long to post but this week has been so busy. I'm thankful for that though because it has kept my mind off of things. First of all, af showed up on her own Thursday! SO SAD! So I went ahead and scheduled my base line ultrasound for Friday so we could go ahead and get the new cycle started. Well, the ultrasound showed that I had 3 BIG cysts on my ovaries which knocks us out of trying this month. I thought i would be devastated but actually I think I'm getting use to the negative tests. Sad, I know, but I am thankful that af showed up instead of having to wait anxiously on a phone call for the bad news. I keep telling myself that it will all happen in God's perfect timing! And i know it will.

On a happy note, DH had another SA done because it had been over a year since his last test and it came back ABOVE normal. Yea he had the "big head" all day bragging to me about his "Super Sperm"! Men are so proud. His numbers were 106 million with 65% motility. They say that average numbers should be above 30 million and 40% motility. So yay for some kind of good news.

On Saturday DH and I decided to go to a state park near us and take some pics using my new camera. We had so much fun spending the day together. He is such a sweetheart. My computer is not cooperating so i will have to post those pics later.

DH and I talked about our plans about having to take a break from the ART program and we decided to wait until after the first of the year to go back. I am going to attempt to lose some weight and hope that helps things along. Until next time!